In a world where parenting philosophies can be as diverse as the families they guide, the concept of gentle parenting is making waves.
Departing from traditional disciplinary methods, gentle parenting emphasizes mutual respect and understanding between parents and children.
As we delve into this approach, it’s essential to understand what gentle parenting is, its roots, and how it differs from common misconceptions.
The Origins of Gentle Parenting
The term “gentle parenting” was coined by Sarah Ockwell-Smith in her 2015 book, “The Gentle Parenting Book: How To Raise Calmer, Happier Children From Birth To Seven.”
However, the principles behind gentle parenting are not entirely novel, existing in various forms in cultures worldwide.
Clinical Psychologist Nanika
Nanika Coor, a clinical psychologist in Brooklyn, emphasizes that gentle parenting reflects a historically respectful parent-child dynamic, prevalent in Indigenous cultures before the influence of colonization.
Leslie Priscilla of the Latinx Parenting Association suggests that these practices have roots beyond Western ideologies, challenging the notion that gentle parenting belongs exclusively to a particular cultural group.
Recognizing the Child as an Individual
Gentle parenting is characterized by viewing children as fully-formed individuals deserving of respect.
Jenna Hermans, a parent coach and author, highlights the importance of understanding the world from the child’s perspective, treating them as individuals rather than mere extensions of the parent.
Traditional Discipline
Unlike traditional discipline methods that rely on punishment and fear, gentle parenting focuses on guidance, teaching, and modeling good behavior.
Chazz Lewis, an educator advocating for conscious discipline, underscores the importance of connected and collaborative approaches over fear and control-based strategies.
Navigating Discipline with Empathy
In the realm of gentle parenting, discipline takes on a new meaning. Instead of resorting to physical or emotional pain, exclusion, shame, or punitive consequences, parents focus on understanding the reasons behind a child’s behavior.
Emily Edlynn, a psychologist and author, acknowledges that occasional outbursts of frustration are acceptable, as they can help children understand the impact of their actions and teach them how to manage conflict.
Importantly, gentle parenting is not synonymous with permissive parenting. While it recognizes the child’s perspective, it also involves setting clear boundaries and expectations, enforcing them kindly and respectfully.
Parenting with Imperfection
One misconception surrounding gentle parenting is the idea that veering off track will irreparably harm the child. However, proponents argue that acknowledging mistakes, taking accountability, and authentically trying to do better next time is a crucial part of the parenting journey.
Parents are encouraged to engage in repair work, demonstrating that ruptures in relationships can be healed. In conclusion, whether labeled as “gentle” or not, the pursuit of emotionally healthy parenting is a shared goal.
By fostering empathy, emotional regulation, and healthy communication, parents can contribute not only to a strong parent-child relationship but also to the development of skills that will serve their children in all aspects of life. The gentle parenting revolution is not about perfection but about embracing the journey of growth, understanding, and connection.